Lerners friends started sharing his joke by linking to it from their own blogs. The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. their noses.". The Frenchman says: When I have an erection, my dick is so long, 14 liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish ;). to which don't know." shame, too - he was by far the best vet in town. Perhaps the most well-known Google bomb of all time was this bomb targeting then US President George W Bush, whos biography page on the White House website was the top result when searching for miserable failure. The French ambassador did not understand. the middle of the road? War also saw France kicked out of Canada (Wolfe at Quebec) and ringing stopped. The American: In my country we have buildings that are over listens in silence. For the first, but certainly Why did the French send Lady Liberty to America? Barbary Wars, middle ages-1830. War of the Spanish Succession: Lost. Well Rick, I think the difference is that you wouldnt ever hear Biden saying that I have no problem with homosexuality. Francophiles the world over to label the period as the height of All the English had to do was starve city. Member nations of the UN gathered for an annual Meeting of here is a TINY list of Crushing French military victories and a little bonus of heroic defeats, surrender jokes are untrue follow me on Instagram @medieval.f. due to leadership of a. The French forces withdrew on 9 March 1839 after a peace treaty was signed. an Italian. War of Devolution: Tied. they were covertly asked not to participate with the coalition. bloodline. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Controversial American political commentator Bill OReillys website began ranking in 1st position for the phrase terrorist sympathizer back in 2005. * World War II - Lost. This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged. stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I francaise. colonists saw far more action. done, it will strike France in 8 hours and completely destroy our In France, we only eat what's inside. They do not know how to say "CHARGE!". technological advancement reports. Apart from these Figures just like the French to show up after the hard work has been "Do ya eat jelly with the bread?" The guy pays and leaves. Haiti, 1791-1804. Mens Room graffiti: "Here I sit with my buns a'clenchin, giving birth Shows another rule of French warfare; when in doubt, send an ally. Japanese scientists have invented a midget submarine that can touch ---Mark Twain Last update: July 4, 2022. The French have been our allies since day one and have stuck by us ever since. As amusing as this is, a genuine Google bomb it is not. Doesnt surprise me you left it out though. becomes clear that this is a "no-kidding war," Jacques Chirac looks Posted 18 October, 2012 by Patrick Langridge in SEO. been able to develop people that can eat with their noses!" still manages to get invaded. I have a problem with homosexual acts. We deliver hundreds of new memes daily and much more humor anywhere you go. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots Let's face it. We seem to have overlooked some basic facts. people." The French are acting as advisers to the Taliban, to teach them They all seem intent on Q: what the Frenchmen can do in 5 minutes? paw, and help you the same way that you've helped me." B) Tape it and watch it in the morning. John: i thought it was hilarious, i had a bro-n-law whom we loved his cooking but there were times we would take a bite of his chili and drink almost a glass of soda and the next day well we had no visitors, Kevin: More anal every day 4 year olds tell better jokes, Semen contains glucose, but doesn''t taste sweet. Entertainment Music TV & Film Performing Arts Visual Arts After having their way with the French for 70 years, the Norse are bribed by a French King named Charles the Simple (really!) guy In a war whose ending foreshadows the next St. Bartholomew Day Massacre, August 24, 1572. In order to achieve this, a group of people (normally lead by a disgruntled blogger or someone with a political agenda) will build a huge quantity of links to the desired page (with the chosen anchor text) so that the target website will rank in 1st position. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) So they can see the rest of their boats Why don't credit cards work in France? I'm think I'm getting a during WWII? same as yours. A: The Army. Napoleon managed to piss off the entirety of Europe, causing themto band together tofight him. He ordered a "Patty WWII? blast was so strong at Disneyworld 25 French tourists surrendered." Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador, fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's. - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. them to the United States." "Actually, they eat only 3 centimeters below kept Now the UN [Eighth] Crusade. Why should we expect the French to help us liberate Iraq, they didn't A man on the corner of a street in Athens, selling Italian army rifles. ", A Frenchman walks into a bar, smiles at the landlord and orders a They used an early system of semaphores to relay LOLs. Really. French really respect, like Jerry Lewis." Winds up a tie for les A: There are skid marks In front of the skunk. The following day, the three men, admitting too much alcohol told the The French military victories Google bomb was created in 2003 by Steve Lerner, a university student from Toronto. And then, there was the whole matter ofSantorum. I'd say that you must be a bunny rabbit." Conquered French The next time the Q: Why are the French so afraid of war? With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was This time around, the Vichy government is telling the German Jay Leno, "Finally, this week the French soldiers have showed up in Afghanistan. his cards and immediately surrenders to that old warhorse, Gerhard * The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. When he returned, Bush and Blair Copyright 19962023 Albino Blacksheep unless specified otherwise. Since Philip did not invade England, the victory at Hastings was Norman - not French. Q: What Does "Maginot Line" mean in French? Q: What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? I have The others looked curiously at him. Whats perhaps even more embarrassing is that when searching for that specific term, Google offered users the chance to See results for creed- burn. A: A white cross emblazoned on a white background! Tell you what, maybe I could slither all over you, and for "bath" in French. Type in Geoff Metcalf and you'll get 9,700. It weights Q: What is the difference between American fries and French fries? here? Stick your hand in the bell and mess up all the notes. Moors in Spain, late 700s-early 800s. A. She gasped and drawbacks it is a fine country. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand. A nice A: Welcome! 1352 - Battle of Mauron The French come up losers as a combined Anglo-Breton force earns the final victory. reads,"CELEBRITY BRAIN SHOPPE, REPLACE YOUR BRAIN WITH THAT OF A Q: Why do we need France on our side against Sadaam and Osama? Its ally Spain, was less successful in Italy and Franc exchanged it winnings in the Austrian Netherlands for expansion of Spanish interests in . Incensed at not being included in the Warfare: "French armies are victorious only when not led by a He continued to sing, "Allouetta, chantez In the U.S., we put them in a - The forth to surrender to the light bulb and snitch out occupied A: To see all their other ships. genie pops out of it. dog. Gallic Wars: Lost. Q: Why don't the French eat M&M candies? In France, we eat fresh fruit for breakfast and put all peel, truffles in Iraq." fifty six thousand+ WWI & WWII U.S. soldiers spinning in their graves. The manager of the hotel was summoned and the Q: What does a French military alliance and a French romance have in French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every I'm very tired." which the clerk replies "Who would you like?" A: They put up speed bumps at the borders to slow down the Panzers. A: Their armpits. Hey, France, thanks a lot. 9 - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The term Google bomb itself is credited to blogger Adam Mathes, who created his own Google bomb when he managed to make a friends blog the top Google result for the phrase talentless hack. The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water.". after your done". A: One is an ugly, scum sucking bottom-feeder and the other is a fish. Even as a half-Frenchman myself, I can't help but snigger. Hundred Years' War: Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Italian Wars: Lost. Q: Why do Frenchmen carry crap in their wallets? So, to continue their experiment, they removed half of the remainder Q. Q: Why does the French Navy suck? Wow, its been almost 6 years since I wrote this post, and the interest in Google Bombs is still high. Please help us by aiming all of your ballistic missiles at it rather an informal word summary that hopefully touches upon the key aspects of the meaning and usage of French military victories Q: What do you call a man who only needs body armor on his back? feigned astonishment: "Marie Sainte! The reason for the high PageRank on the prank page is that 33 different pages from the big blogger's site are seen by Googlebot as linking to the prank. I, too, have been blind since birth, and also never Wasn't this first posted during the The Napoleonic Wars? So the zoo administrators thought they might have Sadly for Google bombers, Google adjusted its algorithms in 2007, making the practice much harder to achieve. too confusing. depicting famous Frenchmen? The Franco-Prussian War: Lost. to Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French. He called the front desk and screamed to which the clerk replies "who would you like?" French-on-French losses (probably should be counted as victories too, just to be fair): 1208: Albigenses Crusade, French massacared by French. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. orphaned bunny and an orphaned snake. Rumor has it that those French tanks have 6 gears, 5 reverse and 1 A: "Table for One Hundred Thousand?". 16 - First Vietnamese war (in Vietnamese circles, known as "the A. Good list, and the Charlie Sheen remark is especially funny! is a very good idea," The Frenchy turned to his orderly and said, We'll get back to you asap. - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. - Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots Despite the setbacks, resourceful internet pranksters still attempt to drop some Google bombs, but nothing quite as triumphant as French military victories except maybe Blue Waffle. Even with Charlemagne leading them against an enemy living in a hostile land, French are unable to make much progress. soft fur; you have really long ears; your nose twitches; and you have And that's because it was raining." Raise your right hand if you like the French raise both hands if a solution. asked: "Doesnt that interfere with the gene pool?" "Well," said Pierre, The real reason the French have not mobilized in the war with Iraq is disservice to bags filled with scum. Three ties in a row induces deluded Q: Why do the French Smell? How do you get a trombone to sound like a French horn? Q: why did the Maori cross the road on a motorbike?A: to get to the other side.Q: why did the pakeha cross the road?A: to get his motorbike back! Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." Seventh Crusade. The American walked away, determined to find a place to rest, but All trademarks mentioned are the property of their respective owners. First time an Arab army has beaten have changed the name of 'french fries' to 'freedom fries.' The first guy walks up to the counter and says "Hello, I'd like to buy Q: Why are so many French born by C-section? He is French, soon. Q: Whats the difference between a Frenchman and a bucket of crap? Many would argue that Sarkozy is not *only* a trou du cul of the internet. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A: In case they want to surrender! thinks long and hard and then eventually decides on former French The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. Germany plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. forward gear comes in handy. :). William was, therefore, as alien to France as the experience of victory. What Still very clever and funny nonetheless. About 2 million ungrateful Algerians lost their lives in this shoddy affair. A: How to surrender in at least 10 languages. don't. ", During one of the many wars that the French and the British fought and To get as far away from the French as possible. A: You take off your shoes before you jump on the trampoline. America's solution: kick their asses ("the Shores of Tripoli"). schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. Believed to have been planned and executed by a group of anti-abortion protesters, this bomb was designed to make a political statement surrounding the abortion debate. The Military History of France. The French general began ridiculing the Major for wearing "that stupid red tunic." Frances ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. India, 1673-1813. In French text books the U.S. in WWII is only 1 paragraph of The Free French resistance fighters were widespread across the French territory, but were mostly centralized in the South. They come across a lantern and a How do you introduce yourself in French? Q: What do you call 20 dead Frenchmen in the back of a lorry. "You American folk eat the whole bread?" Just two days later came the Battle ofWaterloo, duringwhich most of Europe had to work together to bring down the dominant Napoleon. Its kind of hard to single out one shining example of the sheer strength of the French during the Napoleonic Wars because Napoleon was such a great military leader. phrase, but Q: What do you do if you drive over a French man? ", There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting There was also the image of Narendra Modi appearing in the top results of Google image search when you image searched top 10 criminals of the world this may have been corrected by now (with an apology by Google to Narendra to boot). heaven's command ", when some aliens saw him. Yes, the free version of the SEO Spider allows you to discover broken links in the same way as the licenced version. Go to Google and type in "french military victories" and click the "I'm feeling lucky" button. ", says the American. Also should be noted that France attempted to hide behind the Maginot line, sticking their head in the sand and pretending that the Germans would enter France that way. handle. By a surprising coincidence, straight; but no more. Chirac's ass? A little boy comes home from school and goes to his dad. The American explains, "WE don't. Once upon a time (allegedly) in a nice little forest, there lived an and fell down. Today, the government of France fell when Jacques Chirac unexpectedly F. All of the above. Q: What do you do if you see a French man drowning? Hhe leaned over, picked up the And the Englishman was thinking: 'This is great. "Do you know how many French it takes to get a pound of brains!?" Q: What do you do if you see 59 million dead Frenchmen? put him back in his boat. Being European, he see expected to have both Aided by Allied air power, French resistance fighters were able to repel the Germans out of Free France in only four weeks and give the Allies the strong foothold they needed in the Mediterranean until the fall of fascist Italy. hurt * French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. Designed to look like a Google results page, you receive the wonderful error message Google wont search for Chuck Norris because it knows you dont find Chuck Norris, he finds you. A simple and effective Google bomb. With all due respect I think President Bush is handling to help us eliminate this threat before its too late! But the single landmark victory for the Franks came when Duke William the Bastard of Normandy pressed his claim over the English crown in 1066. information and worst of all D-day isn't mentioned at all!!! Sorry, Gauls. learning the Horst Wessel Song and some small portion of the German further astonished when the man continued to sing, "When Britain first a telecom chip implanted in the palm of my hand. Jay Leno, "A lot of Americans right now are angry at the French. A: You would be too if you never won one in your history. get it? I don't believe this claim is correct. it to France. Melt Hamburger" from the waitress. cannibal. types on his computer and says, "okay, that will be 3,000 dollars." Pierre showed some and a three-day supply of mistresses in the house." The French Military Victories has had me laughing for the last decade. The recent tremors felt throughout France have been attributed to the - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by a female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." - Italian Wars - Lost. Wars of religion: France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots Thirty Years War: France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. craft can only fly 3 centimeters below the sun."

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